I take the cup with reverence and bow to the wisdom of this sacred, ancient medicine being, unprepared yet curious about the great teachings I am to receive, hoping that the burden of the deep feelings of fear and unworthiness that I have carried for years will dissolve into dust and nothingness, grounded in the truth of my ancient lineage of High Priestess wisdom carrier ways of good medicine for my People. I touch the hallowed cup of the Divine Feminine principle to my lips and drink deeply, tasting the verdant, lush, earthiness and taking it deep within my body. I sit and wait, patiently, anticipating my Soul’s lessons.
This Grandfather Medicine, the healing balm to my life’s tragic beginnings and the inner turmoil that tasted like death and destruction, fire and ashes. The story that I once deemed limited me, has molded and created someone much stronger and capable than I ever could dare give myself credit for. A Power that no one will ever take away again, and something I will never give so freely. After all, who was I but a bad girl, no good, ugly, disgusting, worthless whore, who nobody would ever want to love. What was wrong with me??? That’s what they told me and that’s what I believed and what I took on and accepted as truth, back then. But what they really saw was a brilliant, bright, shining light of courageous, generous love, given to them in spite of their hatred and ugliness to me. They wanted what they didn’t have.
They wanted what I gave freely and openly, nakedly baring my Soul aspect of what love really is. They wanted to break me, but they could never tame this wild, passionate Goddess that I hid beneath the cool, hard, glossy exterior, burning so feverishly and brightly. And so, they left me and shattered my luminous Heart into a million pieces, filled with the Power I gave them, it’s no wonder they kept coming back for more and more.
In every season, this vessel lies fallow after the death and destruction of self, readying the luscious earthiness of my body to be tilled, planted and seeded, yet again, as the strong yet tender green shoots grow, lovingly watered and tended by the Light of the heavens and molded by the earth, the wind, the sun and waters, guided by the moon, the sky, my medicine peoples and Star Elders. In every season I die, in every pattern I re-emerge to a new awakening, a new aspect of self, and a new template. I rise, reborn in body, mind and spirit, to embody the treasured gift of life, the joy, pain, suffering and glory of this Holy Living.
Now, I taste the sweetness and juicy deliciousness of this life, well lived! The pain, struggle and suffering serving me as a catalyst for Soul growth, Soul Splendor of this experiential life in a Human Body. My Divinity shining in my eyes, the truth of my existence here on this ancient being, the Great Mother, my only Mother, who lovingly supports my every step in my beauty walk on her belly, and who nurtures my body, my bones, my Soul, tending to my every need so gratefully, exquisitely and unconditionally with the greatest love I have ever known. I master how to be soft and tender, to allow myself to flower and bloom in Love’s magnificent gift of grace and beauty.
The sweetness and beauty of love, the savior and a salve to my open wounds, flows from my lips and through my glowing heart, weaving words of tender grace and bittersweet cries of goodbye as The Phoenix inside of me rises through the ashes yet again as I am continually made and re-made. I rise higher and higher, touching the Heavens with my Heart, and am enveloped in Love’s Tender Grace.
The medicine of my Grandfather flows through my veins, whispering and entwining his love, his teachings and legacy, into every cell of my being as I graciously allow, surrender and take in His wisdom into the very center of my existence. I see my Star Family surrounding me, smiling upon me in my Re-Memberance of my origins and in who I came to be on this good Earth. I bow in reverence and gratitude, tears glistening in my eyes of the unspoken, untranslatable magnificence of this sacred feeling of pure LOVE, untouchable now, no one can hurt me ever again.
With every goodbye
In Soul Service to our Collective Wholeness,
Gabriella Margarita Galvan
Moyocoyotzin – She who Creates Herself
I know that I have savored the hot taste of Life
Lifting green cups and gold at the Great Feast.
Just for a small and a forgotten time
I have had full in my eyes from off of my girl
The whitest pouring of Eternal Light.”
~ Bilhana-11th Century
Owl ally visiting me on the porch of my cabin, in the daytime, right before I drove up to the Mesada.
About the Author
Gabriella Galvan is a ceremonialist, healer and a Mesa Carrier in the Pachakuti Mesa Tradition, is fully trained as a Shamanic Practitioner, Reiki Master, Advanced Dreamwork, Past and Between Life Regression therapist, Qi Gong instructor, Crystal healer and Intuitive/Spiritual Counselor. She walks the path of the Wounded Healer, with studies in a wide range of modalities, esoteric arts and communing deeply with nature and her guides, and by diving deeply and doing shadow work into her own psyche, has brought tremendous healing to her own life. This has been a driving force and catalyst in her service work with others as a facilitator and in teaching others to empower themselves and showing them that THEY are the true healers. Helping and sharing knowledge with others with a compassionate open heart has brought the greatest joy into her life. Gabriella currently lives in Brownsville, Texas and you can find her by email at Gabriella@sacredsoulsonghealing.com.